Ever since I started concentrating on my health, I’ve had a strange, upsetting reaction. Whenever I would see someone overweight (usually bigger than myself), I would panic. Especially in restaurants. It was upsetting because it made me feel awful – I AM overweight, and I’m reacting like this?
Today I went to the Y to do my workout. There was a woman there who was very overweight, and she was sitting on one of the recumbent bikes, looking at a magazine. She was barely moving her legs, barely moving at all. And I got mad. Not mad at her specifically, but at myself….the old me.
It made me realize that when I would panic upon seeing these people, it was because they reminded me of me – who I was, who I could be. And it would make me angry to see what I was doing to myself. How horribly I was treating myself. How lazy, indulgent, and hypocritical I was to myself.